What's that smell?

Cole has begun to pay attention to his farts. He'll look at me and say "My butt say pffffttt!"

So, always trying to increase his vocabulary, I've started explaining to him, "Oh, you PASSED GAS."

The other night Dan forced out one of his huge, offensive Coke burps and Cole looked up and commented, "Dada pass gass out his mouth." So I thought the "pass gas" terminology was sticking.

Until the other day...

Cole and I were sitting in McDonald's having lunch together and I smelled shit eminating up from his crotch. There were people at the table next to us, and I figured it wouldn't be long until the stench wafted over to them, so I tried to be pro-active and address any diaper-changing needs before the smell was too widespread.

"Cole, did you poo-poo?"

"No, just pee-pee."

I leaned over and checked his diaper, and, lo and behold, it was clean. Noticing how perplexed I was, Cole explained, "I farted."

"What did you say?" I was horrified. This was not the vocab term I had hoped for. I didn't even know he knew what a fart was. What happened to "passing gas"?

"I FARTed," he said, loud enough for all the surrounding tables to hear.

Next time I'll just let the smell of shit waft up from his crotch and leave it at that.